It Wasn’t My Fault

“It wasn’t my fault!” If you’re a parent, this is a phrase you have heard quite often. When they’re small it can be kind of cute.  After all, it wasn’t Goalielocks or the Mayor’s fault they spilled all the toothpaste and put toothpaste footprints all over the upstairs. Of course, it was entirely their fault given there was no toothpaste fairy that squeezed the toothpaste all over the floor.  Unfortunately, the plethora of sweet, minty, stick and blue footprints led to a hole in a wall as my hubby realized the scope of the issue.

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Now that they’re older it isn’t as cute.  Moreover, it’s super important that they understand that it was indeed their fault.  My son’s phone rang in the middle of class courtesy of spammer.  Unfortunately, he had forgotten to turn of the ringer, so his teacher confiscated the phone for the remainder of the day. In fact, the school’s policy prohibits him from collecting the phone at dismissal.  Nope that would just be too simple and let the kids off to easy.

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At this point,  I was at work running from meeting to meeting.  I just taken on a new role at work, so needless to say I’m quite busy. His friend text me to tell me that his phone had been confiscated for ringing.  Naively I assumed he would be able to pick it up as he left school that day.  Interestingly enough he never told me via his friend’s phone that we would have to be the ones to recover said phone.

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I called the school once I saw he was on the bus without his phone.  The front office staff was incredibly sweet and helpful.  She called the teacher, but was unable to reach her via phone.  Consequently, she tried to page her, but to no avail.  Finally, she sent someone to check the classroom as the teacher hadn’t turned in a phone.  When she came back on the line, she informed me they had found the phone in the teacher’s classroom. 

The teacher had left with my son’s iPhone 8 sitting out in the open.  I’m a little peeved about that because I don’t think the teacher nor the school would have paid for a new phone had his been stolen.  Oh and the only way to get it was for us to pick it up.  Now I’m just aggravated.  His school is neither close to home nor close to work for either of us. This had become quite the pain in the arse.

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We were finally able to collect the phone around 6:40 pm.  Curiously, if I hadn’t called the school, we may not have known we (the parents) had to pick up the phone.  We started talking about the situation and the old refrain came up “it wasn’t my fault.”  His argument was he couldn’t control when the spammer called.  Of course, his argument did not consider the fact he had forgotten to put his phone on silent.  Had he put his phone on silent as he does every other morning, he wouldn’t have had it taken away.  At the end of the day, it wasn’t the end of the world, but he needed to take accountability for his actions or in this case inactions.  Fortunately, he caught on pretty quickly, which brought an end to the lecture.

Tonight’s song performed by Shaggy (and apropos to tonight’s title) is “It Wasn’t Me.”

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Life With Teens

Life with teens is oh so fun.  I knew getting into this whole parenting gig that we’d be in for it when our sweet, darling baby became a toddler.  Yeah, they were right.  When our kids were toddlers many a tear was shed by them and us.  In fact, for the first two years of his life, I was convinced the Mayor was an 88 year old man from Boca trapped in a toddler’s body.  He was that cranky.  However, it seems nothing can prepare you adequately for the beast that is a teenager.

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There are quite a number of similarities between the toddler and teenage stage that i have notice.

  1. Temper tantrums – While they once threw temper tantrums over losing blocks, not watching Caillou or other very serious toddler problems, as teenagers they now lose their ish over the simplest of things.  For example, you should always proceed with caution when asking teen to go to bed, take shower, do homework or god forbid to do a chore. c1f4170247f3ad17b1276bc1c2f8e137--raising-teenagers-raising-teenager-quotes
  2. Rock solid logic.  Have you ever argued with a two year old?  No, there’s a reason for that.  Its a zero sum game.  The beauty of teenagers is their intellect and their vocabularies are a little more mature.  For example, tonight I asked Goalielocks to take a shower right after practice, so he doesn’t keep everyone up with the commotion.  His response, “great well I guess I don’t get to eat tonight.”  Now mind you, he had pizza before going to practice.  Another favorite of mine is their argument that we want their animals today because we won’t take them to Petsmart or Petco immediately.  To date, we have not lost an animal due to a delayed trip to the pet store.IMG_1260
  3. Their taste is music is equally horrible as it when they were a toddler.  Only when their teens, the music is a much more insidious albeit still simplistic.  If you’re curious what I’m referring to check out the song “Gucci Gang.”  They also think Tupac wasn’t a real rapper and sucks.  No further explanation is needed here. You’ll be begging for the muscial stylings of Sesame Street in no time.
  4. Their personality is often amplified as both a toddler and a teen.  Did you have a strong willed toddler? Well, boy oh boy, are you in luck because you’re about to have a strong willed teenager.  (I’m praying for you now.)
  5. Stubbornness is a trait that both age groups excel at and is so pleasing to parents.    IMG_1475
  6. They’re silly.  At least they share some good traits, eh.
  7. Whether or not they will ever admit, teens need their parents.  In fact, they need us just as much as a teen as they did when they’re a toddler.  The dynamic may shift, the aggravation level will increase, but they will need you.  Moreover, they will need you as a parental figure and not a friend.
  8. As a toddler, you’ll clamor to enroll them into the best preschool.  While when they’re a teen, you’ll agonize over secondary and higher education options.   It is a bit overwhelming at first, but I’m hoping by the third one we’ll have it mastered.

Each and every stage of the boys lives has been an amazing chapter.  Our oldest is an adult, which sounds odd every time I say it.  My oldest has become an amazing man and is proof that the hubby and I can survive life with a teenager! Tonight’s song performed by Nirvana is “Smells Like Teen Spirit.”  I loved this song when I was a teenager attending junior high dances where we’d all bang out head to that song.  For me, it also represents Jake’s awakening into music.  It wasn’t too long after he started choir as a high school freshmen that he began to discover real good music.  Nirvana was one of the first, of many, bands he discovered.