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Kitchen Sink

So I have a story that includes everything even the kitchen sink. I give your fair warning that this story is going to be gross and make you question life. Unless you have teenage boys, in which case you’ll strangely find this story believable and dare I say normal. It all began in a gate community west of the turnpike…

Our story starts off with a peaceful evening in our house. The parents and puppies have gone to bed and all is quiet. Anakin is trained to use a pad. Consequently, we leave him out at night and he usually sleeps in our bed. Sometimes, however, he misses the mark. Tuesday night he missed the mark Consequently, he left a land mine in the middle of the floor.

The Mayor, who has a weird aversion to lights, got home from hockey practice after we were already in bed. He doesn’t like the lights on, so he left them on. Unfortunately, this meant he didn’t see the land mind Anakin had left for him. Fortunately, he was still wearing his shoes, so it didn’t get all over his feet. It didn’t crunch or anything like that. It did, however, make a mess of the bottom of his shoe.

So you may be asking yourself, where does the kitchen sink play into this story? Well, I’ll tell you. Apparently, the Mayor decided the right place to clean the dog shit off of his sneakers was our kitchen sink. But wait, it gets worse. He also decided to use the brush we use to scrape dishes clean to clean his shoe. To be fair, he cleaned up the crime scene, so you wouldn’t guess what happened to the kitchen sink the night before. However, he also left the scrub brush there like he hadn’t just used it to clean up dog shit.

This all came out yesterday on my lunch break. At first, I was sure he was kidding. There’s no way he would wash shit off his shoe in the kitchen sink. But then I remember, he’s a teenage boy with the common sense of a toddler. In the end, we ended up throwing both scrub brushes away since he didn’t remember which one he used. He is also now acutely aware that messes like that need to be cleaned outside with the hose and a tree branch. As for the kitchen sink, it’s been bleached and cleaned. Yet, I still can’t look at it the same way.

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Summer Vacation Has Started

Summer vacation has started and thus far it is taking a serious toll on my wallet and my patience. Don’t get me wrong, I do revel in foregoing the school routine in the morning. Last week was the boys’ first full week out of school. Admittedly, I felt their hot lunch bill was taking a huge toll with the multiple sandwiches/entrees and drinks everyday, but boy was I wrong. Let’s take a look at their first week home by the numbers:

  • 8 frozen pizzas slayed
  • 120 pizza rolls devoured
  • 60 juice boxes demolished
  • 14 Jimmy Dean croissant sandwiches gone
  • 12 Powerades depleted
  • 10 hotdogs enjoyed
  • 4 gallons of milk
  • A jar of peanut butter gone
  • A loaf of bread
  • 1 lb of spaghetti
  • A jar of marinara sauce
  • 1 lb of chicken
  • 1 can of black beans
  • 1/2 bag of brown rice

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I say slayed for the pizzas because one met a different fate having been dropped half in the bottom of my oven, while the other half fell to the floor. I should also mention that over the course of the week, the Mayor did cook them spaghetti with onions and jerk chicken with black beans and rice for lunch on separate days. With the younger two boys now 13 and 15, my grocery bill is sky rocketing. Both boys are growing like weeds and eating like they’ve never been fed. I might send them to summer school to bring down my food bill! This week I added some more milk and more fruit.

Back to the pizza for a second because I fully thought they had eaten 8 frozen pizzas. After all I bought 6 Digiorno pizzas on Wednesday and by Thursday night there was only one left. Apparently, the Mayor had a slight pizza mishap with a major portion of it landing on the bottom of my oven. Importantly, the Mayor forgot to mention to anybody that this had happened. You can imagine my surprise when the room became very smoky as I pre-heated the oven for brownies. We’re still working on getting the smoke out of the house! Fortunately, it was only a lot of smoke and no fire, but the Mayor learned an important lesson: make sure you tell your parents if you drop a significant amount of food in the oven.

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While they’ve been busy eating us out of house and home, they’ve also logged some nice hours outdoors fishing. The weather has only been cooperative for them in the morning and evenings these past few days. Fortunately, the Mayor and Goalielocks have been able to take advantage of the few morning hours and fish before the daily afternoon storms fire up. Our lake in back has some nice sized large mouth and peacock bass, which my boys love to fish.

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Of course, they’ve had their share of chores over this past week. Unfortunately, they’re not as proficient in competing their chores as they are in eating their weight daily. Nonetheless, we saw some some serious progress on that front at the end of the week. Thankfully, I’m able to control our house’s wifi from my phone, so there was no wifi until all of the chores were completed.  Summer vacation has started and hopefully as the weeks go by they get better at completing their chores.  One could only hope!

 

 

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My Mayor Turned 12!

Yesterday, my mayor turned 12!  I can’t believe our youngest has only one year left before becoming a full fledged teenager.  While he’s not in the teens by number, he’s certainly in a teen when it comes to his appetite and his demeanor.  Of course, the Mayor’s been feisty since he was born, so none of this is a surprise.   Fortunately, my Mayor is a sweet as he is feisty.

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His birthday weekend was pretty low key.  While the hubby helped my brother with the floors, Jake worked and Goalielocks was at a friend’s, my Mayor and I spent the weekend hanging out.  Saturday we upgraded his phone to the iPhone 8 as his iPhone 6 was starting to fail in everyday.  Undoubtedly the phone served us well, it simply wasn’t going to last one more day.  Thankfully, the demise of his phone was timed well with his birthday weekend. He was overjoyed today when he got home from school since his phone held it’s battery all day.

We also picked up a Fitbit for both he and Goalielocks since they’re going to start running with me.  In addition, we got some new workout clothes, a new wall ball, a curved agility ladder and an acceleration trainer.  All the things they’ll need to be in good shape going into next year’s hockey season.  If it weren’t for the slight fever and cold The Mayor had this weekend, we would have started our workouts this weekend.  Nonetheless, I had blast this weekend with the birthday boy and cannot wait to see what the next year will bring him.

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Tonight we had planned to start running together, but of course, life had a different plan.  This morning Goalielocks was beset by severe, localized abdominal pain.  When I left for work this morning, I assumed he had picked up his brother’s cold.  Apparently, I was wrong. #winning While at work, I checked on him periodically.  His symptoms were a bit worrisome as doctor google suggested, he likely had appendicitis.   I was both slightly worried and slightly encouraged that doctors google didn’t say he was dying.  For once, I thought doctor google might actually be on point.

I headed home early to take him into urgent care, so we could rule out appendicitis.   His symptoms were pretty well aligned to the condition.  After the year we had, I didn’t want to press our luck by waiting it out. I had visions of his appendix bursting as he binged watched Family Guy on Hulu.  It was not a good vision…..  Urgent care wasn’t able to rule out appendicitis as they couldn’t run a CBC and get timely results.

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Back to the ER we went….. You know it’s bad when they don’t ask for an insurance card anymore because they recognize you.  Or when the doctor comes in, he remembers treating your family before. #notwinning.   As with any trip to ER, we spent several hours of our lives waiting for lab tests, ultrasounds and consultations.  Fortunately, Family Guy was on and helped us pass the time.  Ironically, it was on the very episode I started watching last night, but missed when I went to take a shower.   I know feel like I have closure having watched the episode and several others in their entirety.

Thankfully, after a long wait, we were given the all clear by the doctor.  Both his blood work and ultrasound were negative for any abnormalities.  We left the ER with a diagnosis of gastritis and Zantac/Pepcid AC as a means to treat the discomfort.  We’ll continue to monitor him as he still has localized pain and will be following up with is pediatrician.  Thanks to everyone from the love, prayers and support today it is very much appreciated.  As a side note, the ER rejected my suggestion of a frequent flier program (i.e. every visit you get a stamp and your fourth visit is free.). Special thanks to my girl Jutta for the brilliant suggestion!  As for us, it’s time to reset the days without an ER visit to 0.

 
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Surreal

We’re living the surreal life as we transition from life with little kids to life with teens and gulp and adult.  It’s almost surreal that Jake’s in college, Goalielocks is looking at high schools and the Mayor just completed his first quarter of middle school.  In many way, Jake’s graduation from high school still feels quite surreal.  Obviously, I’m not old enough to have a college freshmen and no kids left in elementary.   While my boys are getting older, the hubby and I haven’t aged a bit.  Its truly a thing of wonder.

As I drive to work each morning, passing by the elementary school my kids attended for nine years without having to drop off a kid feels both odd and strangely liberating.  Life’s transitions, are tough, rewarding and ever evolving.  Last spring in my Zumba class I was commiserating over my son’s forthcoming graduation and adulthood with my class. When one of my Zumba girls so poignantly reminded me that graduation is one of life’s many transitions into new and exciting stages.  Wow, I hadn’t thought about it like that before.  It was eye opening and a bit liberating.   Although admittedly adult or not, Jake will always be my sweet,  little, blue-eyed boy.

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We’ve settled into a new routing of sorts, with Jake at class 4 out of 5 days per week.  He already registered himself for the next semester.  Jake also paid for his first semester himself (proud mama moment.)  While Jake finds his way at college, the Mayor is hitting his stride in Middle School.  I was so worried about him starting middle school, but those worries were for naught.  He’s absolutely loving his culinary academy and so are we.  Particularly, I love when I come home from Zumba to dinner courtesy of the Mayor.  Honestly, he’s a phenomenal cook.  The Mayor always saves me sauteed onions and sets protein aside (if I’m watching my carbs) me.

Goalielocks, meanwhile, is raising a veritable zoo in our house, but hey it’s better than video games.  He continues to confound his teachers by neglecting homework and acing all his tests.  Subsequently, I’m sure you can guess the source of my high blood pressure and angst.  With high school coming next year, we’re really working hard to get his home work and study habits in line.  For all you parents with strong willed children, I know you understand what were up against.

One thing I do miss from last year, is the opportunity to run with Jake.  His work and school schedule have made it almost impossible for us to train together.  I can’t tell you how much running with him improved my time and cardio capacity!  I’m hoping as his semester and my Zumba class wind down for winter break that we’ll be able to get back into the habit of running together.  Otherwise,  it will be an ugly run for me at the Purple Stride event on November 19th!

Tonight’s song of choice: Keane “Everybody’s Changing”