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Stormy morning

I woke up this morning to rolling thunder as my alarm went off.  There’s nothing like lying in bed enjoying the sounds of the rain and thunder and relaxing.  Unfortunately, on a Wednesday morning this beautiful combination of rest and relaxation is not possible as my office beckons.  Instead, rolling thunder with my alarms on a Wednesday commute means a protracted commute.

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I rushed out of bed to get ready knowing that the commute would be hellacious and that I needed to stop and get gas before getting on the turnpike.  As I left my neighborhood, my tire pressure came one.  The only thing worse than pumping gas in a South Florida thunderstorm is putting air in a tire during a South Florida thunderstorm.  Unfortunately, it appears that I have a puncture in my right rear tire.  Thank goodness for my knight in shining armor, who met me at the gas station and fixed my tire.

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The rest of my commute was slow, scary and laden in rain. While the puncture in my tire could have been a poor omen for the rest of my day, it was not.  Building positive relationships and analyzing the business is always invigorating.  Plus, any work day that ends with a dinner at Blue Moon Seafood Company is a winner.  Sometimes even a day with the roughest start can end up being one of our brightest day.

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My Loud Life

There used to be a time, probably about ten to twelve years ago, that if you wanted to reach me the best way was to call me.  The problem with phone calls, especially once you have children, is that it isn’t until you are on the phone that the children need you desperately.  It is one of the Murphy’s Laws of parenting.  This also applies to anytime you go to take a shower, bath, or sit down to relax.

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Without fail, even still, when I am on the phone, my boys and my puppies become the neediest and loudest creatures on the face of the planet.  No matter where in the house I hide, they will track me down.  The matter of course is always urgent in nature, like needing more gems for mobile game, hunt a lizard (Athena) or to locate the Roku remote.  Serious business that dad can’t resolve and that can’t wait for another minute.

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My boys came with three volume settings: loud, louder and loudest yet.  This comes in handy in restaurants and stores where they’ll make horrifyingly embarrassing comments that you hope and pray nobody overhears.  Then you say prayer that if by chance they did overhear the comment, they didn’t judge you too harshly.  It is also convenient for long car rides, which thanks to travel hockey we have many, where they can argue loudly for hundreds of miles as we drive across Florida.

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Life in a house full of boys is only quiet when they’re sleeping or when they’re scheming.   With the Mayor and Goalielocks, this can be a dangerous proposition.  You never know what scheme they’re cooking up or what animal they’ve captured and hid somewhere in the house.   As a boy mom, when there’s silence and they’re not sleeping, you know something is about to happen.

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The truth of the matter is when the Mayor finally graduates and life quiets down, I think I’ll be a little lost.  My days and nights are full of noise from the puppies to the mini hockey games upstairs to every interrupted phone call, but for almost eighteen years that’s all I’ve known.  Until that day comes, I’ll enjoy the madness and the brief respite my yoga mat provides.

 

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Small Gains Turn Into Big Triumphs

Almost two years ago, I started running 5K races.  I had never been a runner and had never run a 5k, so I set a goal for 2016 to run 12 5Ks in the year and break the 30 minute mark.   I hadn’t run since middle school, but when I did run I was quite fast just over the 7 minute mile mark.  When I started off running and was barely under the 10 minute per mile mark, I couldn’t believe how slow I was and how hard it was to run that fast.  What had happened to all that speed?

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I trained halfheartedly the first part of 2016, with multiple trips and excuses complicating the training schedule.  In August of 2016, I buckled down and started training in earnest running 20-25 miles a week with my oldest son Jake.  The beauty of running with Jake is that I had to work to keep up with him since I don’t enjoy being left in the dust.  He is significantly faster than me, so this was a huge win for me from a training perspective.

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Our first race of the 2016-2017 season was early in September and it was a scorcher.  I was pumped up and ready and he was apathetic and dressed in pajamas and skate shoes.  I ran my heart out and broke the 30 minute barrier.  I was thrilled!  Meanwhile, Jake crushed the race and won his age group.  I ended up placing 4th in my age group, which was a huge triumph for me.

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By the end of the year, we had continue to whittle away at our time.  Jake got his down into the 21 minute range and I got my 5k down to 28.5 minutes.  Hitting both of my goals, the time and quantity were huge wins.  Sometimes though training, and life, is all about the small wins.  Over the course of the year, we had littles wins at each event.  Race after race, we chipped away at our times and built confidence.  When it comes to training, little gains add up into big wins.  Don’t get discouraged if you’re only seeing small movement in your times.  Overtime, you will see just how much you have gained.

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This year we’re working on our time and adding distance.  We won’t be running as many races, but that’s okay.  My goal was to be able to run a mile under 8 minutes and I finally did this in April, but now need to extend that pace out two more miles.  We plan to add in a 10K sometime this fall, which still seems daunting to me.  This time of year, it is difficult with the weather to coordinate our runs, but we cannot lose focus or the 10K will be painful.   And yes, sometimes it is okay to have one of those days where getting out of bed feels like a major triumph.

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Be Authentic

Who we are, how we lead, how we work, how we parent and decisions we make are all based on a frame work of morals and ethics that were ingrained with us from our youth.  Sure over the years, our moral and ethical framework evolves, but the shifts are not crisp, nor are they tectonic in nature.  Or are they?

I believe in servant leadership and have practiced it in my current role and at my previous company.  My leadership style isn’t and wasn’t based upon a company or management philosophy in place, but rather based on how my moral and ethical framework interprets the role of a corporate leader.  In other words, it is authentic to who I am and how I operate.  My leadership style has never been a tool of expediency.

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There are times in our lives, where it will be tempting to give into expediency and pivot from our ethical framework and our leadership style.   Giving into the expediency may result in short term gains, but as a leader the voracity of your character will be questioned by your subordinates and those above you.    Before you pivot to expedience, ask yourself if the short term gains will outweigh the longer term ramifications.  How will your organization perform if they no longer have faith in you or your intentions?  Is it worth the risk?  I would argue all day every day that it is never worth the risk.

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Establishing a Writing Habit

After a decade long break from writing, I picked it up again when I started this blog in late April.  Rusty and out of practice, it felt both good and terrifying all at once.  Inspired to write by the circumstances of my life, I felt compelled to create this blog.  Writing provides me with a creative outlet and a platform to help others.  Many people start writing, painting or another creative outlet because they’re inspired by their life’s circumstances, but they don’t continue pursuing their art as their inspiration wanes.

The thing with inspiration is that it is not constant.  It is fickle and ever changing.  If we rely only on inspiration to drive our craft, than we are likely lose interest as our inspiration wanes.  Rather than relying on inspiration, rely on habit.  Make your craft a part of your daily routine.  This will make it a way of life and not reliant upon the fickle nature of inspiration.

The draw in participating the daily prompt for me was exactly that.  It has been to establish writing as an important part of my daily routine.  This will help me polish my writing skills and ensure my blog doesn’t become just a flash in the pan.

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Life’s Storms

Life is fickle.  Life is funny.   It seems to go one of two ways.  Either nothing is happening or everything is happening and our world is collapsing around us all at once.  Both the boredom and chaos associated with either scenario can be all encompassing and destructive.  In the calm, it is easy to become complacent.  In the storm, it is easy to give up, but don’t.   You are much stronger than you ever imagined.   As Victor Hugo so eloquently said, “even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.”  And remember, as you weather the storm, you are not alone.

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Worn With Pride

Uniform, jersey, sweater it has many names.  It is symbolic of the high level of commitment it took to attain it and symbolic of the club which is represents.  There are a number of great quotes involving uniforms about what it means to be an athlete.

Brooks’ quote is legendary and I think most of us remember it from the movie Miracle or from the Lake Placid games.  The philosophy of playing harder for your team than for yourself is a key component of hockey culture.  It is also a critical component of what made his 1980 team so special.  In 1980, the team was comprised of college players mostly from University of Minnesota (Go Gophers!) and Boston University.   Just as they do today, my Gophers and Boston University enjoy a healthy rivalry on the ice.  In order to get his players to put their egos and these college rivalries aside, he needed to unite them around a common goal and that was playing for the name on the front of their jersey Team USA.   Brooks was a genius.

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Clemente’s quote speaks to the pride that athletes feel when they put on the sweater.   At the professional athlete, I cannot imagine how amazing it must feel.  Major League Baseball is the pinnacle of baseball and to make it to that pinnacle after years of hard work must feel otherworldly.  The pride he, and his family, must have felt the first time he put on that MLB jersey are something he will probably never forget.  I remember the first time my sons’ put on their travel hockey jerseys.  The smiles on their face went from ear to ear.  You could see the pride the felt in their achievements and they carried their heads a little bit higher.

Lastly, I’ll leave you with my favorite quote on a uniform and it comes from my favorite brassy gal Mae West, who as always said it best and wasn’t wrong.

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Imaginary Troubles

If you’re like me, ever since children entered the picture, sleep has been an issue.  While you may have been a deep sleeper before, you now wake up at the drop of a pin.  God forbid your dogs bark or your partner snores because then you won’t even be able to fall asleep.  The problem with this of course is that as you try to sleep and can’t, the mind starts racing.  Sadly late at night, the mind never goes to a good place.  It goes into your psyche and taps into your anxieties and fears.

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Once those ruminations start, they are hard to stop and you find yourself struggling to slow your racing mind.  These imaginary obstacles have your heart racing and your brain on overdrive.  When you do finally fall asleep, the anxiety may abate temporarily only to resurface the following day.   It is an odd facet of human nature that we are inclined to ruminate about a past that we cannot change and a future that we cannot predict.  These ruminations can become overwhelming if you allow them.

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If you find yourself obsessing over potential issues or obstacles in the future, stop.  Just as you cannot change your past, you cannot live by focusing on future problems.   To be clear, you can exist, but you cannot live.  Your life will pass you by if your time is focused on your past or on your future.   Focus on your present, the people you love and that which you can control.

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Life will hand you difficult hands, but you are much better equipped to deal with the difficulty than your worries suggest.  The struggles you worry about often seem insurmountable, but when faced with actual struggles you will overcome them.  Have faith in your strength and in the strength of your relationships, which will help carry you through the difficult times.

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Brassy and Beautiful

Brassy women often elicit one of two reactions. People either love them or hate them. Nobody fit the profile of a Brassy women better than Mae West. For her time, Mae West was considered by many to be brazen, a bit vulgar and tastelessly showy. While she was a huge box office draw on the Vaudeville stage,  Broadway and at movie theaters nationwide; her plays and films were critiqued by morality groups and even city officials. West was even jailed in 1927 in New York City after debuting her play Sex on morality charges. She was sentenced to ten days and served eight days on account of good behavior.


Throughout her lengthy career, which spanned sixty nine years, Mae West stayed true to herself. Her performances and characters were brought to life through a lens she  crafted. Even in her early Vaudeville days, her performances were injected with her spunky, brassy persona. In making the leap from Broadway to Hollywood, this didn’t change. She didn’t let Hollywood change who she was or how she portrayed her characters on film. She stayed true to herself and true to her craft.

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It would have been easier for Mae West to abandon her brassy persona as she was the target of many moral groups and even the police throughout her lengthy career. She didn’t let the critics, society or the studio bosses dictate who she was or what she did. Whether you’re a fan of her movies or not isn’t important. What is important is to live an authentic life and not compromise who you are to get ahead or make someone else happy.  In living a life that is authentic to your values, live fully and unapologetically without looking back.

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