I’m so ready to head up to Minny tomorrow. I’m not so ready, however, to have an empty nest. While I head north to see family, including extended family due to a 50th wedding anniversary, the Mayor will head west for hockey. We’ve pretty much have hjm ready to go less a few things we need to pick up tomorrow morning before I fly out. He’s super excited to get junior hockey started.
Meanwhile, I’ve checked into my flight and have been praying to the upgrade gods. So far it’s looks a little iffy for a first class upgrade. Comfort plus May happen, but we shall see. Worst case scenario, I came at a the Sky Club while waiting for an aviator to fly me away. And just think I’ll have nobody traveling with me, so there will be no complaints about the food tomorrow. Unless I decide to complain to myself, but I don’t think that we’ll happen. I prefer waiting in the Sky Club to minimize interaction with the gate lice, who like pirates are thieves of joy.
How do you plan your goals?
I plan my goals around how I’m feeling mentally and physically. I also use current performance as a basis. Over the past few years, I’ve had to learn to be flexible with my fitness goals. Injuries and Graves’ disease have knocked me from my goals a few times. In those cases, I’ve learned to pivot and create new goals that are physically possible. I thin one of the biggest things I’ve had to learn is being flexible with my goals in the face of chronic illness.
I’m putting a little more effort into today’s post versus yesterday’s. I was in a bit of a mood and November Rain conveyed that mood better than anything I could write. Well, at least anything that would have been appropriate and inoffensive. Yesterday just wasn’t the most fantastic day of my life, nor was Tuesday for that matter. It was, however, another day above ground, so I’d still classify it as a victory.
In order to cleanse the mood, I decided to burn some of the Palo Santo I bought in April. Our yoga teacher in Mexico burnt it during our practice and it smelled wonderful. Palo Santo, like sage, is also supposed to cleanse and clear the bad energy out from your space. I’m not sure about all of that, but I definitely and accidentally sent off the smoke detectors. Perhaps I’m missing part of the diffuser or process, but whoops!
Insert Palo Santo for sage and yesterday for 2020 and this would be accurate
The last two days made it glaringly obviously that Athena is gone. She had a way of knowing when any of us were having a bad day. In fact, she made it her business to take care of us on those days. She was such a loving mother hen. I really miss her. Our house just isn’t the same without her.
Create an emergency preparedness plan.
We’ve had an emergency preparedness plan for years because we live in a hurricane prone area. This plan includes our hurricane kit, canned foods, and hurricane shutters. It also includes a plan to ride out the storm in our home. We choose to ride out the storm at home because we’re not in a mandatory evacuation zone. There are a lot of people that live in mandatory evacuation zones that need to be able to get to safety. Now if it was a catastrophic storm headed our way, then we would think about leaving. The one inquiry we would make before leaving is what shelters/hotels or airbnbs would allow us to bring onto dogs.
I survived my doozy of a Monday. It took forever to end as falling asleep was damn near impossible. In fact, I didn’t fall asleep until well after midnight. The good news is that once I finally fell asleep, I slept really well. In fact, I even got up in time for work today. What a feat! Actually, I got up early enough to go grab my own coffee before starting my work day.
Monday may have been an absolute drag, but the weekend was pretty fantastic. Friday night we ordered Sushi Yama for Goalielocks last dinner before heading back to school. As always, it was amazing. We really enjoy their crispy rice appetizer. The rice is so good and the tuna it’s topped with is delish. Naturally, the boys also enjoyed their usual helping of fried rice and chicken katsu. We ended out night by watching Messi and InterMiami.
Naturally, Goalielocks was packing most of Friday night and Saturday before leaving Saturday afternoon. Of course, he left the loft looking like a bomb of water bottles and text books had gone off, so that was nice. Hubby ended up cleaning up his mess Sunday while the Mayor and I ran errands. After Goalielocks left, we headed to our friends for a hockey family BBQ. It was hot as hell, but thankfully they had a gorgeous pool with some nice shade.
The BBQ was a last hurrah for our boys before they all head their separate ways for hockey. The Mayor is moving to Ft Myers to play junior. His Goalie is staying local, but also making the leap of juniors. R is heading north to Canada for a hockey academy. While B is heading to New Hampshire for some AAA U16 action. It’s crazy to see their youth hockey careers coming to an end. The Mayor was a mite for what at least a decade and now he’s playing juniors. It’s all just a bit overwhelming.
Sunday the Mayor and I went suit shopping. The Eels where suits to and from their games, so he needed to pick up some more dress clothes. Jos A. Bank had an amazing sale going, so I got him two new suits for $300. Prior to suit shopping, we also ventured into WalMart, while I charged the rental. I enjoyed driving the Polestar in Boston once it was reconfigured, so I wanted to see how the Hubby liked it. This time Hertz included a guide outlining the difference in using an EV versus traditional car, which makes renting an EV much less of a pain.
What brings you peace?
My dogs bring me peace. There’s something so innocent and pure in the way our dogs love us and our families. Their loving kindness brings me peace even during life’s toughest hours. Working out is an activity that brings me peace. It’s also acrucial part to staying both physically and mentally healthy.
She’s home. Yesterday Goalielocks picked up Athena’s remains from the funeral home. They did a beautiful job on her package just as they did on Maya’s package. Now Athena will join her sister in our bookshelf next to her sister. They’ll both be watching over us while we’re hanging out watching television or eating. Additionally, I’m buying a memorial stone for each puppy to put out front in the garden. I’m also going to add some orchids and a fountain, so it will be a beautiful peaceful space.
Last night we had a great dinner with my brothers’ families, less my younger bro who got stuck at work, in a Boca. It was an adventure getting out the door per usual. Three of us are ready to go waiting on Goalielocks. He then comes out the door flounces out the door angrily as if we had kept him waiting. As for the restaurant, this place has the best nachos in the world. Honestly, I don’t know why I order anything else because the nachos are so good. Of course, the company was just as good as the nachos. I realized this morning, however, that much to my mother’s chagrin, we neglected to get a picture of all of us together. Whoops! Hopefully, we’ll be able to see them again before they head North and Goalielocks heads to college.
Since we forgot to take pics last night, here are some pics from their last visit.
We ate in Boca, so we ran into a people we knew. We saw the Berner’s from hockey, which was a nice treat. Additionally, the boys saw one of their favorite teachers from middle school. Consequently, the ride home was full over funny stories about that particular teacher, middle school and all of our school experiences. It was a really enjoyable ride home.
I started running again this week and boy am I tired. Fortunately, today was a cycling day, which is a much easier workout. Well, it may be an easier workouts but it’s not easy. Bakari, one of my favorite Apple fitness instructors, legit kicked my butt with his long as intervals today. While I was cycling over lunch, the hubby was enjoying a beautiful view of the water including two nice sized sharks. It’s a beautiful and overwhelming experience to see sharks live and in the wild. They’re such majestic animals that I would not want to share the water with.
It’s been a stormy afternoon here. Fortunately, the storms took away some of the heat, which made the dogs’ lunchtime walks tolerable. The last few weeks the lunch walks have been tough due to the overwhelming heat. At least it’s August and we only have two more months of summer here. Usually, it starts to cool down in October, but nothing about this year has been usual.
I love a good thunderstorm, so long as it doesn’t impact power. Last time we lost power, not storm related, it set me back several hours at work. The power surge fried the peripherals and made it really difficult to work. After a day of working with IT, I finally got everything back up and running. There was definitely an art to resetting everything fully to make it work. Honestly, it’s a little frustrating given I was using a surge protector that the company provided.
While I’m busy selling insurance, the boys are getting ready to leave for the year. Goalielocks heads back to UCF on Saturday. Judging from the way the upstairs looks, he’s got a lot of stuff to pack. I also need to make sure he doesn’t leave with my foam rollers, massage gun, or cervical pillow. If he’s up to his usual monkeyshines antics, then I wouldn’t be surprised if they end up in his new apartment. By the way, his new apartment looks like an absolute palace. He’ll have his own bedroom and bathroom and will be living with his best friends. Student housing has come a long way since I was at the U.
P.S. Nordstroms Anniversary sale may have just ended, but Fabletics semi-annual sale just started today.
P.S.S. If you’re wondering what a cervical pillow is, here’s what I bought on Amazon. It’s really helped relieve my neck and shoulder pain.
I had a great, albeit busy weekend. In fact, I left the house three days in a row, which has got to be a record. Friday night I went to dinner with our PanCan Affiliate chair Joelle, PanCan regional manager Kathleen, Rita (one of our amazing survivors), and her daughter Marni. Unfortunately, Addie, who is our community relationship manager from PanCan got sick and was unable to make it. We definitely missed Addie, who is a big reason for our affiliate’s success and a big reason I jumped on board. Dinner was fantastic. The company was great and a good time was had by all.
Friday’s outfitSaturday’s outfitI searched for the perfect purple outfits. A lot of the results I got were more vermilion than purple.
Saturday morning we got ready for our affiliate social event at Barrel Of Monks Brewery in Boca Raton. The brewery generously donated the space for our event. I love that the brewery is back in the middle of an industrial/office park. South Florida has a lot of hidden gems like this brewery. Despite its non-traditional location, the brewery was super easy to find and free parking was abundant. After breaking the bank on parking in Boston, I have a real appreciation for free and ample parking.
The event itself was great. We spent about an hour decorating the space before folks arrived, so it looked really nice for folks. I built a candy bar because they look pretty and I like candy. Thankfully, we had a really good turnout for the event. It was nice to see so many new faces come out to support the affiliate and celebrate our successes with them. Moreover, our affiliate is full of wonderful people that love and support each other. I’m sure you can see from the pictures that this group is extraordinary. It’s nice to have an added layer of support as one navigates the grief pancreatic cancer has caused.
Unfortunately, Addie wasn’t able to make the social on Saturday either. We missed her dearly. Despite being terribly sick, she still sent her boss with a beautiful gift for me. Let me tell you, Addie is so thoughtful and kind. She gifted me a framed tribute to Athena. It’s so special. Joelle, our amazing affiliate chair, also gifted me a beautiful orchid in remembrance of Athena. Their kindness and thoughtfulness meant so much at the end of a very difficult week for me. Both items now grace my desk where they won’t gather any dust.
After the event, I chilled at home and we watched a movie. Sunday morning was relaxing as well. I baked bread and ran in the morning. At night, the Mayor had a Wolf Pack 4 vs. 4 tournament that we went to watch. We’ve done countless 4 v 4 tournaments over the years. Most of them are pure shit. One team, usually the tournament organizer’s favorites, blows out everyone else. It’s just not fun. In contrast, South Florida Wolfpack does a great job of creating teams with parity in mind. Literally, any team could win and every game could go either way. Consequently, I think it’s a better experience for both players and parents.
I’m so excited about my purple weekend. Our community relationship manager from PanCan is in town, our dearest Addie, so we’re having a couple of fun events. Tonight we’re doing dinner with some of our top captains and affiliate leadership. Tomorrow, we’re hosting an amazing social event at a local brewery for our affiliate. We’ve had a lot of RSVPs for the event, which is exciting.
My purple weekend will be the perfect way to honor Athena’s memory and distract myself. I’m really looking forward to spending time with my purple family. After the events, I have a lot of stuff to get done around the house. Unfortunately, while Athena was ill, we got very little done. The house work has piled up. The disorganization in my room is exacerbating my neuroses. One thing I won’t have to do is sweep now that I got my new Roombas working.
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
A couple of months ago, the Mayor and I were at Sprouts picking up some groceries. When we were in line at the checkout an old man lined up behind us. He was in a boot. I had to wear a boot for nearly four months, so I know how much it sucks. The gentleman was just picking up a few items. While the cashier rang up our items, he ran to the bathroom. Consequently, I asked the cashier to add his things to my bill. This way he’d come out of the bathroom and his groceries would be bagged and paid for. Obviously, we didn’t stick around to see his reaction, but I hope it made his day brighter.
I have been on the receiving end of random acts of kindness. When we were on the shuttle bus to pick up our rental in Boston, it was late and I was a hot mess. I cried most of the flight up to Boston knowing our time with Athena was short. I’m sure the Prosecco didn’t help. It was well after midnight and I’m feeling gross. At the stop before ours, the train station, a young family gets up to get off the shuttle. As they departed, their oldest daughter stopped to tell me I was pretty. It was one of the sweetest things someone had ever said to me. I certainly wasn’t feeling pretty and was feeling pretty low, her kindness put a smile on my face and warmed my heart.
I shared the story of the Bostonian, who on his lunch, re-calibrated and set up my EV rental to make it easy for me to drive. His kindness will stick with me always. On Tuesday when we carried Athena’s remains out to the truck, an older couple had pulled up to the vet’s office. When they exited their car with their sweet dog, they were crying for our loss. They both expressed their condolences and the husband gave me the nicest hug. Their compassion and kindness meant so much to me. It was a beacon of light during a very dark hour.
I guess the point in sharing these stories is that we have a choice. We can choose to be assholes and put negative energy out into the universe. Or we can choose to be a light. Random acts of kindness make a huge difference in a person’s day. A compliment may seem small to you, but to the recipient, it could mean the world. You don’t know where people are in their journey. Try to leave them better off than they are before your interaction.
I wanted to say thank you, to all our friends, families, and readers, for the kind words of love and sympathy we have received since Athena’s passing. Losing a beloved pet is a heartbreak that many of us have experienced. I’m touched by the outpouring of love. Grief is a crazy beast. I know Athena’s passing may have brought back memories of pets that have gone before her.
Even before her passing, I was struggling with how to effectively honor her memory. I’m going to buy a stuff version of Athena and Maya for the family and for our puppies. Athena came into our life via an animal rescue event at PetSmart. If it wasn’t for the incredible folks that volunteer at these rescues, we would not have had any of our dogs. All four of our dogs came from rescue organizations in South Florida. In her honor, we’ll be making a donation to Justin Bartlett Animal Rescue, which is where we adopted both Anakin and Arrow.
The rescues in South Florida are full. In fact, two local shelters waived their adoption fees in July to help clear the shelters. Nonetheless, there are still many animals that need a home. A shelter is a much better place to be that the streets, but like a hostel it’s meant to be temporary. If now isn’t the right time to adopt, there are other ways to support the animals like donating money, items, and time. For local kids needing volunteer hours, Justin Bartlett is a great place to volunteer.
Thank you again for all the kind messages, texts, and phone calls. Your love and support have helped carry us through this difficult time. Now I’m off to make the second part of my liquid lunch.
It’s the next day and the loss of Athena has started to sink in. I’m so sad. I know, however, we had to say goodbye to her, and am relieved that she’s no longer suffering. Her eyes and skin had become so jaundiced and her eyes had lost their twinkle. Athena had eyes that could convince you to give her whatever she wanted. They were full of love, life, and manipulation. I certainly couldn’t tell her no. As for yesterday, I had mixed feelings about it. I wasn’t sure how I’d feel watching her being put to sleep. In the end, it was a relief that she was free of pain instantly.
She wasn’t your average dog and certainly deserved more than the eight years she was granted. I know we’re not the first to lose our dog (or animal) and feel this way. So many of the people I love have experienced the loss of their beloved pet, which is a total gut punch. I wish our dogs could live as long as we do. I would have loved to have Athena by my side for the rest of my life. It’s almost cruel that we get to share the earth with them for such a short time.
I didn’t grow up with dogs as my dad and brother were severely allergic. In fact, I grew up terrified of dogs particularly big dogs. My neighbors at our first house had a big, black lab that I found particularly scary. I even had a policy against dogs that could eat me like Rottweilers and pit bulls. Consequently, it’s a little ironic that as an adult I’ve had four large dogs including two black lab mixes and two terrier mixes. Maya helped me overcome my lifelong fear of dogs. Maya and Athena both tuned me into a dog mom obsessed with her big dogs.
When we first adopted Athena, I had no clue she had any pit or terrier in her. I sent a picture to the family group text and my sister-in-law pointed out the pit. Naturally, I freaked out due to my policy against dogs that can eat me and ordered a DNA test. Turns out Athena was fifty percent American Staffy with the other half being lab, boxer, and beagle. Or as the Mayor said, “Our dog is a bagel!?!?” What I learned throughout my eight years with Athena is that the breed I feared most made the best family dog we’ll ever have. She was the kindest, highest emotional intelligence, most gentle, loyal, and protective dog you’d ever meet. She was never inappropriately protective (I’m looking at you Anakin.) Athena would only become protective when someone in our family was threatened.
So here I am the next day missing my sweet angels. Maya and Athena brought us more joy than they could ever know. They opened a world to me that I didn’t think I could exist in. Now I can’t see myself living without a canine companion. At home, Anakin is grieving his loss. He’s been carrying around her blanket and his duck with impunity today. Athena and Anakin had a very special relationship. She was an instrumental part of Anakin’s life. It will take him some time to heal.
Good night sweet Athena, you were the best dog a family could ask for. It was unbelievably hard to say goodbye to you today, but it would have been selfish to let you suffer. I hope you’re in heaven running laps with Maya free from the pain of cancer and safe in the knowledge that your family loves you unconditionally forever and always.
We brought her to the vet after celebrating Taco Tuesday with her. Athena enjoyed her taco even if she couldn’t finish it. We brought her blankets and her brother’s favorite ducks to the vet with us. I confiscated Anakin’s duck, so she could have it with her and have his smell with her at the end. The whole day felt surreal like a movie. I can’t believe we had to say goodbye to her so soon.
In memory of Athena, here are a couple of beautiful poems:
Four Feet by Rudyard Kipling
I have done mostly what most men do, And pushed it out of my mind; But I can’t forget, if I wanted to, Four-Feet trotting behind.
Day after day, the whole day through — Wherever my road inclined — Four-feet said, “I am coming with you!” And trotted along behind.
Now I must go by some other round, — Which I shall never find — Somewhere that does not carry the sound Of Four-Feet trotting behind.
A Good Dog Never Dies – Anonymous
A good dog never dies, he always stays, he walks besides you on crisp autumn days when frost is on the fields and winter’s drawing near, his head within our hand in his old way.
Treasured Friend – Anonymous
I lost a treasured friend today The little dog who used to lay Her gentle head upon my knee And shared her silent thoughts with me.
She’ll come no longer to my call Retrieve no more her favourite ball A voice far greater than my own Has called her to his golden throne.
Although my eyes are filled with tears I thank him for the happy years He let her spend down here with me And for her love and loyalty.
When it is time for me to go And join her there, this much I know I shall not fear the transient dark For she will greet me with a bark
